Armed only with his mysterious mental connection to the feral minds of studio executives, the Movie Guru reveals just how good or bad this week's new releases will be:

The Cookout (PG-13)
Todd Anderson (Storm P) is on top of the world when he’s chosen as the NBA’s No. 1 draft pick. Now $30 million richer, Todd moves to a swanky pad and attempts to stay cool with his family and friends by hosting a cookout. Can Todd survive the gathering without burning his buns or alienating his family and new neighbors? With Tim Meadows, Ja Rule, Eve, Queen Latifah, Danny Glover and Farrah Fawcett.
Now Showing: Knoxville Center, Wynnsong 16, Foothills 12

Paparazzi (PG-13)
Director Paul Abascal and producer Mel Gibson seek symbolic revenge on behalf of all the poor, helpless celebrities who’ve ever been hounded by the bright flashbulbs of paparazzi photographers. The story: Major film star Bo Laramie (Cole Hauser) hunts down a determined tabloid shutterbug (Tom Sizemore) whose relentless tactics nearly caused the deaths of the actor’s wife and child.
Now Showing: Knoxville Center, Farragut Towne Square, Tinseltown USA, Wynnsong 16, Foothills 12

She Hate Me (R)
Director Spike Lee’s latest joint finds up-and-coming biotech executive Jack Henry Armstrong (Anthony Mackie) blowing the whistle on his document-shredding bosses (Woody Harrelson and Ellen Barkin). Suddenly unemployed—and through an odd twist of events that only Lee could conjure—Armstrong teams up with his lesbian ex-girlfriend to market his sperm to a gaggle of single gals desirous of the seed of an intelligent, healthy and attractive black man.
Now Showing: Downtown West

Vanity Fair (PG-13)
William Makepeace Thackeray’s novel comes alive in vibrant color under the direction of Mira Nair (Monsoon Wedding). In the early 1800s, Becky Sharp (Reese Witherspoon) endeavors to climb the London social ladder and abandon her heritage as an impoverished orphan. While she charms all the right people, her past and her passions threaten to unravel all that she has achieved. With Bob Hoskins, Gabriel Byrne, Jim Broadbent and Jonathan Rhys Ifans.
Now Showing: Downtown West

We Don’t Live Here Anymore (R)
This moody film revolves around the affair of Jack and Edith (Mark Ruffalo and Naomi Watts) and how their scandalous relationship affects them and their victimized spouses (Peter Krause and Laura Dern). Based on two stories by author Andre Dubus (whose story “Killings” was adapted into In the Bedroom). Read the review.
Now Showing: Downtown West

Wicker Park (PG-13)
In this American remake of the 1996 French romantic-thriller L’Appartement, Josh Hartnett plays a Chicago investment banker obsessed with finding out the truth behind the mysterious disappearance of his girlfriend. Through frantic chase scenes and complex clues, the banker’s world is turned upside-down and nearly destroyed after he pursues a woman he believes to be his long lost love.
Now Showing: Knoxville Center, Farragut Towne Square, Tinseltown USA, Wynnsong 16, Foothills 12

Once Upon a Time in the Midlands

Once upon a time in the what? Located (appropriately enough) in the middle of the British isle, the Midlands are half a world away from the rugged Southwestern U.S. terrain depicted in Sergio Leone’s Once Upon a Time in the West, whence this movie draws its title and some of its inspiration. Nevertheless, it’s a fine setting for this 2002 Shane Meadows film that successfully mixes modern romance with spaghetti western ambiance.

The film opens with deadbeat Jimmy (Robert Carlyle) seeing his ex (Shirley Henderson) turn down a proposal on national television, at which point he decides to pay her a visit in an attempt to rekindle an old flame.

Rhys Ifans plays Dek, the amiable but slightly pathetic boyfriend/almost-groom, whose gangly and somewhat cowardly demeanor immediately makes you sympathize with him. The film is predictable, but that doesn’t deflate much of its charm. It’s funny, sad and ridiculous all at once, more than good enough to keep you from switching over to cable.

Don’t be put off by the accents, especially the thick Glaswegian dialect—the pace and tone of the dialogue will steer you in the right direction. Though the storyline is sometimes weak, the actors are expressive and entertaining, and make the film worth watching.

Most of the cast looks familiar, and you might spend half of the time trying to place them. (Carlyle, especially, is familiar from his roles in like-minded Brit-pics such as Trainspotting and The Full Monty.)

The film is filled with memorable moments, such as the scene where Jimmy and a few other thieves brawl with a band of cash-laden circus clowns. Another scene where Ifans is forced to drive a pink three-wheeled rental car, will, at the very least, make you smile.

It’s difficult to lump this film into one genre. Despite its spaghetti western allusions—mostly music, and as well as some scenic nods—it can be tagged as either a comedy or a drama. But if the premise doesn’t throw you, and you can stomach the accents, Once Upon a Time in the Midlands is a fine little film.

Rosemary Nottoli

September 2, 2004 * Vol. 14, No. 36
© 2003 Metro Pulse