Going, Going...Not Going Anywhere

Do not adjust your set. The Hampton Inn billboard ruled illegal by Knoxville development director Doug Berry is still there on I-40 in West Knoxville, four months after it was ordered removed. The board caused a stir in April when Berry's predecessor, Susan Brown, okayed it despite rulings against it by both City Council and the city's Board of Zoning Appeals. In the time between Brown's approval and Berry's reversal, billboard operators Douglas Advertising say they signed a multi-year contract with Hampton Inn—a contract they feel, naturally, more obliged to than any piddly city ruling. The bottom line: "Unless they take that board down in the next 30 days, litigation is likely," Berry says. But the billboarders might get a bit of a break—city attorney Mark Hartsoe, who's been handling the case, is currently tied up trying to shut down Fantasy Video, the alleged pornopeddlers on Papermill Road.

Look to the Sky

Moviegoers who decided to see the "remade" Psycho last weekend also got an added bonus: A trailer for a new movie called October Sky. Why should local film fans be interested in this particular preview? Because October Sky is the new title for Rocket Boys, the movie that was shot mostly near Oak Ridge last spring. Unlike Knoxville's previous brush with Hollywood, Box of Moonlight, October Sky appears on track to make its March 31, 1999 release date instead of being sucked into a distribution vacuum. The short trailer didn't reveal too much East Tennessee scenery (or Gay Street, either—can't wait to see the "Ennesse" theater), but the movie itself looked promising with subtle period details and scenes of Chris Cooper being grouchy and Laura Dern looking earnest. The film is based on the autobiographical book by Homer Hickam about his childhood fascination with rocketry.

Free Ideas

For some years, UT's Knoxville Urban Design Studio has sent fifth-year and graduate architecture students out on quests to redesign the face of our not-always-fair city. This year, students had their work cut out for them. With downtown in the throes of something, UT's imperial campus on the offensive, and Fort Sanders writhing in the torture chamber, it seems clearer than ever that Knoxville could use some Big Picture planning.

This Friday at 5 p.m.—just before the Santa Claus parade, for those who want to combine trips—the Studio will bring its drawings to a storefront on the west side of Market Square and unroll them for the public. Among the proposals are some surprises: the closing of Summit Hill Drive downtown, to rejoin dissected downtown and restore the urban fabric of the lost block; restoration of UT's Hill to its original park status, plus another plan to add other gathering places on campus; and a greenbelt around Fort Sanders. In these immodest proposals of what Knoxville could look like in our lifetime, visitors are guaranteed to find something interesting, startling, appalling and, just maybe, inspiring. Get 'em while they're free. Sure they're students who came up with these plans as an assignment, but we're ready to bet that in about 10 years, we'll probably be paying some big-shot consultant big bucks to tell us some of the same things.

A Young Man's Practical Education

It all started with a note passed to Mary Lou Horner at the November County Commission meeting: "I have an idea... You and Leo have had to shoulder the burden of this entire issue yourselves. I urge you to allow your colleagues to assist you to come to a workable solution. You don't have to do this all on your own."

Horner: "He was going to solve our problem for us. Leo Cooper and I have been working on this for years, but he knows more about Halls than we do. Phil Guthe thinks he's got the answer to everything."

She's talking about the convenience center commonly known as the Halls dump, which has long caused traffic jams on Maynardville Highway. County garbage czar John Evans and his boss, County Exec Tommy Schumpert, had worked with Cooper and Horner, and were asking County Commission to buy a new dump and to authorize acquisition of a strip of land from a local stockyard to provide access. They foresaw no problems.

But the property owner, George Myers, balked, hired lobbyist John King, and the proposal failed on a 9-9 vote. Cooper, Schumpert, Evans and Horner were stunned. By meeting's end, Guthe, who voted no, saying the property was "too expensive," had formed a task force, AKA the "dump committee," to study the issue. It was composed of himself, Mike Arms, and David Collins, all of whom, like Guthe, are brand-new commissioners, and none of whom live in Halls.

Cooper says Guthe "...needs to be better informed before he takes action...I would never have done that as a new commissioner. Mary Lou and Tommy and I had no idea we were going to get blindsided..."

Guthe pushed forward, never dreaming that his help was widely seen as interference.

"I'm not against Halls," Guthe said. "I'm for Halls. I came up with the idea of putting together a task force—I asked Mary Lou and Leo to be on it, and they respectfully declined..."

Then he started reading about himself in the Halls Shopper, where publisher Sandra Clark waxed poetic (excerpts follow):

T'was the month before Christmas
and all throughout Halls.
The trash cans were filling with nary a pause.

Mary Lou in her 'kerchief, Leo in his cap,
Had got past the 'lection in time for a nap;
They called trash disposal a very big issue,
But claimed a solution with nary a miscue...

We'll move it beyond Ridenour's new shopping center,
And out by the stockyard where no one comes hither...

But out on the highway there arose such a clatter, they sprang from their beds to see what was the matter.

And what to their wondering eyes should appear,
But George Myers and John King and eight scrawny brown steer.

The stockyard's got standing to keep our place scrumptious
"No trash here, no traffic, and surely no dump, sirs!"

But Victor's not nestled all snug in his bed,
While visions to annex all dance in his head.

"Let's help them," he called to his fine city crew
"Hey, trash? Not to worry! We'll collect it for you...

"We'll vacuum your leaves And scrape off your ice
"We'll only tax double, if you'll just treat us nice.

"We'll send our fine police chief to save you, you fools!
"Red nose? Not Phil Keith! That's just the O'Doul's."

More rapid than eagles on the critical vote,
The majority vanished with nary a note...

First Moody, then Collins! And Goo-duh the Phil,
Now Medley and Mike Arms! And Michael McMill.

Where's Cawood and John Griess? Staunch allies all!
Where's Schumpert and Evans?
They're out in the hall! Talking with Victor and John King and Myers
How come there's so many irons in this fire?

The pickups from Maynardville park in a row,
and mini-vans line up with garbage to throw.

While Horner and Cooper and Evans and Schump
Say, "Do not worry, we'll site you a dump."

But then in a twinkling, I know it's not so...
More fightin' and feudin.' So On With The Show!

After one meeting of the dump committee (which Horner and Cooper boycotted), Guthe rethought his position and decided to get the heck out of Halls. He wrote a letter of surrender apologizing, sort of, to Horner and Cooper, but said county departments should henceforth fill the new commissioners in on "...issues that predate this year's election."