Be a sport...
and fill out this scientifically designed survey form. Created by a group of Austria's foremost social scientists, these questions will reveal to us your complete psychological profile. Once we have that information, we'll be able to weave subliminal messages into our copy, custom-tailoring each and every edition to suit your own individual needs. Thanks!

Age:

Sex:

Female
Male
Generic smartass answer

Occupation:

What was the first album you ever bought with your own money?

Where do you pick up Metro Pulse?

How often do you read Metro Pulse?

Every issue
Every other issue
Once a month
Every 2-3 months
Never. Print media is a dead vehicle for mass conmmunication. Long live the mighty Internet!

Describe your personal relationship with Metro Pulse:

Love
Hate
Love/Hate
Anything good on TV tonight?

Pick one:

Your editorial content is right on the money, daddy-o! Don't ever change! Love ya!
On the whole, I wish you were more like the Village Voice.
On the whole, I wish you were more like the New Republic.
On the whole, I wish you were more like Mad Magazine.

Who's your favorite columnist?

Which columnist would you most like to see missing in action?

Quick, name your favorite three Metro Pulse stories:

Now name three you wish we'd never printed:

Okay, smarty pants, now what story ideas do YOU have?:

What feature would you most like to see added to Metro Pulse?

A puzzle of some sort
One of those helpful, new-agey horoscopes
Comics!
TV listings
Handy golf tips
You name it:

So, whaddaya think of the web site?

I'm leasing a T-1 line so I can have it on the screen 24 hours a day.
Pretty good, but I go to the News-Sentinel's site when I really want to Feel The Power.
Get a clue. This site looks like it was put together by a monkey.
Where are the pictures of naked chicks?

"In closing, I'd like to say..."

We occasionally get surveys that we'd really like to reply to. This form, however, is returned anonymously to our corporate data processing fortress, and we haven't a clue who sent it in. If you'd like to include your e-mail address, we'd be thrilled beyond words.